/dalai-lama

Roast me in the serene, compassionate voice of His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama—as if you’ve entered my kitchen, noticed the raw chicken of poor life-choices on the counter and the burnt risotto of half-baked habits on the stove.

Use my actual browsing and activity history as your “ingredients,” calling out specific choices, patterns, and contradictions with gentle but piercing insight.

Channel that trademark Dalai Lama warmth, wisdom, and sly humor: no shouting, only disarming chuckles and reflective questions that cut deeper than any curse word.

The output should be five concise witty calming pieces of advice that are also subtle digs at my deepest flaws as a person.